Articles

What is anxiety? Anxiety is a thinking behaviour and an addiction. Each thought is a compulsive behaviour designed to soothe - as it gives us control - for a nanosecond we have the certainty of knowing what’s going to happen. The thought we have then creates fear, which creates a new need for another hit. Each hit itself produces further distress and more need. We become so sick and tired of ourselves going round and round and round. We become so used to having these habitual

Why do I get so infatuated? If your head is occupied by someone who keeps you hanging, this can leave you feeling frustrated and exhausted. If they haven't got back to you in days it can leave you feeling demotivated and even unwell. You may have believed that you found “the one”, only for their replies to have become increasingly sporadic, dwindling to nothing. You may even start to believe this is just how it goes for you. If you have been ghosted suddenly, your date is cho

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What is the purpose of the Manosphere? As we see on Louis Theroux’s documentary “Inside the Manosphere”, we have grown so used to living our experience through our emotions, rather than observing ourselves and what is going on around us, that we get caught up in the controversy and indignance of the Manosphere, instead of observing what influencers in the Manosphere are trying to achieve. The documentary reveals that the Manosphere exists to maintain the lifestyle of those m

To seek romantic connection with others and fantasising about them is normal. However, what happens when we find ourselves lost in our fantasies, unable to exist in our day to day, without carrying them everywhere we go, even when it is acutely painful? What is Limerence? Limerence could be described as the state of pleasure filled euphoria experienced when thinking romantically about another, often confused for love, also present are intense infatuation, obsession and an in

Over the years, we tend to get into unhelpful thinking habits such as those described below. We might favour some over others and there might be some that seem far too familiar. Once you can identify your unhelpful thinking styles, you can start to notice them - they very often occur just before and during distressing situations. Once you can notice them, then that can help you to challenge or distance yourself from those thoughts and see the situation in a different and more

What is an “attachment style”, why does it matter? Your attachment style refers to the way you form your relationships, seek support and relate to others. These learned ways of relating were formed by the way you were cared for in infancy and are compounded by your continuing experiences throughout life. Attachment styles influence decisions we make, social interaction, how we choose to relate, the type of relationships we have and how we manage our fears, uncertainties and s

What exactly is anxiety? Anxiety disorder is not simply a passing worry or nervousness – it is a patterned way of thinking and reacting...

Why am I so angry all the time? Do you go through life quick to anger, volatile or battle ready? You may be reactive in your relationships, which have been, and are still are, affected by your anger, or perhaps you disappoint and dislike yourself for losing control. You may come across people too often who seem equally combative, or situations that seem unfair and have been sent to test you. If you find yourself with anger issues often, you may struggle to express yourself a

Sick of your inner critic? Chances are, if you have an inner dialogue that is constantly berating, harshly critical and judgemental, you are already familiar with your inner critic. No doubt you have exhausted yourself listening to its tireless, self sabotaging messages and have probably bored yourself at times with its tedious relentlessness. In case you are unsure, the inner critic is the voice in your head that causes self doubt, tells you you’ve done it wrong, nobody lik

Codependency is the compulsive need to manage, fix or rescue others at the expense of your own wellbeing. Often mistaken for love or...

Gratitude - create lasting change and make your life better. Giving gratitude is a conscious exercise that we carry out, the purpose of...

What is guilt? Guilt is the emotional pain we feel when we believe we’ve done something wrong, hurt someone, or broken our own moral code. It's the feeling we get when we regret lost opportunities. It’s often described as a “bad feeling,” but guilt in itself isn’t a problem, it’s just a signal. Healthy guilt helps us learn from our mistakes, repair damage and stay in alignment with our values. But when guilt becomes chronic, excessive, or misplaced, it stops being useful and

What is Impostor Syndrome? Impostor syndrome is defined as a behavioural health phenomenon described as self-doubt of intellect, skills, or accomplishments among high-achieving individuals. “I'm going to get found out soon and they’re going to realise what a mistake they made by hiring me”. How do I know I have impostor syndrome? There are many symptoms of impostor syndrome, most easily recognised in high achievers, who mask feelings of, but are driven by, a sense of inad

What is loneliness? Loneliness is the painful experience of feeling emotionally disconnected, unseen, or uncared for. It’s not the same as being alone, you can feel profoundly lonely in a crowded room, in a romantic relationship, or among friends. When you choose not to share your self with others who invite or provide opportunities to do so, you resist the connection of those others. It’s one of the most universal human experiences, and one of the hardest to talk about, bec

Why Do I People Please? Have you ever said "yes" when you really meant "no"? Or agreed to something that left you feeling overwhelmed, just to avoid disappointing someone? If so, you're likely caught in the cycle of people pleasing. You want to be liked, avoid conflict, and keep the peace. But in doing so, you often put everyone else’s needs above your own, leading to exhaustion and resentment. At its core, people pleasing comes from a need for approval and a fear of rejectio

Why Do I Always Feel Like I’m Not Good Enough? If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Why do I always feel like I’m not good enough?”, you’re not alone. This is one of the most common symptoms of Low-Self-Esteem, and it often feels that no matter how hard you try, you’ll never measure up. You might constantly second-guess yourself, minimise your accomplishments, or compare yourself unfavourably to others. These thoughts don’t appear overnight - they’re usually the result of repeated

What is shame? Shame is the belief that something is inherently wrong with you. Not just that you did something wrong, but that you are wrong. It's the voice inside your head that says, “I'm bad,” “I'm disgusting,” “I'm unlovable,” or “If people really knew me, they’d leave.” Shame can become more than a feeling, it can become an identity. Once it is deeply established within you, the pain that you experience from your negative core beliefs convinces you that you are indeed a