Anxiety
Anxiety develops from our early experiences of life and relationships. It can keep you awake at night, plays on repeat in your mind and makes even small decisions feel overwhelming. Sometimes, it feels like you're bracing for something - but you’re not sure what.
It can show up as overthinking, avoiding plans, second-guessing conversations hours after they’ve happened. It can make your body feel on edge, with a racing heart, tight chest, or restlessness you can’t shake. Often, it’s the critical voice that tells you you’re not coping, even when you are. Anxiety can isolate you - making you question your choices, your relationships, your worth.
But anxiety doesn’t have to be permanent. With the right support, you can come to understand it, work with it and eventually move beyond it. There is a way through - towards calm, clarity and a life that feels more in your control.
Low Self Esteem
Low self-esteem can be ever present in every interaction you have. It says you're not enough, colours your achievements as luck or accident, and makes compliments feel hollow or undeserved. Sometimes, it feels like you're constantly falling short - but the bar keeps moving higher.
It is apparent when you compare yourself to others, dismiss your own successes and replay your mistakes long after others have forgotten them. It can make your inner world feel heavy - that familiar ache of self-doubt, the exhaustion of never feeling quite right, the weight of believing you don't measure up. Often, it's the voice that convinces you others are just being kind, even when their praise is genuine.
Low self-esteem can shrink your world - making you pull back from opportunities, relationships, and experiences that could bring joy. But low self-esteem doesn't have to define you. With patience and a compassionate approach, you can learn to recognise its patterns, challenge its assumptions and gradually build a kinder relationship with yourself. There is a path forward - towards self-acceptance, genuine confidence and a life where you can see your own worth.
Relationship Problems
Relationship problems can build gradually through growing resentments, lack of understanding and from a struggle to articulate your needs. They create distance where there used to be closeness, turn conversations into arguments and make you question whether you're being heard or understood. Sometimes, it feels like you're speaking different languages but neither of you knows how to translate.
Relationship issues can look like walking on eggshells, rehashing the same fights, or feeling lonely even when you're together. It can make your connection feel fragile - that hollow feeling during tense silences, the exhaustion of trying to read between the lines, or the fear or resignation that one more conflict might be the last. Relationship problems can make you feel stuck - questioning whether things can improve, whether you're compatible, or whether love is enough.
But relationship struggles don't have to spell the end. With commitment and the right tools, you can learn to communicate more clearly, understand and respect each other's needs and rebuild the trust and intimacy you once shared. There is a way back - towards deeper connection, genuine understanding and a partnership that feels secure and fulfilling.
Insecure Attachment
Insecure attachment can feel like living with one foot out the door. It can make you crave closeness while simultaneously fearing it, leaves you analysing every text for hidden meaning and turns love into a minefield of desperation. Or maybe you expect to be ignored and unheard, or minor betrayals feel monumental and cause you to shut down your feelings for others. Perhaps you find it difficult to even know what you are feeling, or you think you don't care about anyone else.
It could show up as needing constant reassurance, assuming the worst when someone pulls back, or that you prevent yourself from getting too intimate. It can make relationships feel like a battlefield - the familiar panic when your date hasn't responded quickly, the exhaustion of second-guessing their feelings, resenting your partner for saying irrelevant things, or the confusion of wanting someone close but feeling safer at a distance. Often, it's the voice that tells you you're too much or not enough, depending on the day.
But insecure attachment patterns can change. With awareness and practice, you can learn to recognise these patterns, understand where they came from and in changing them, build the capacity for healthier, more secure and fulfilling connections. There is hope - you can have relationships that feel safe, authentic and grounded in trust.
Defensiveness
Defensiveness interferes with relationships. It turns feedback into attacks, makes you justify your every action and a need to be right transforms conversations into battles you need to win. Sometimes, it feels like you're constantly under siege - even when no one is actually fighting you.
Perhaps you find yourself explaining yourself before anyone asks, hearing criticism where none was intended, or firing back before fully listening. It can make your body feel like armour - that familiar surge of heat when questioned, the tight jaw during difficult conversations, the exhaustion of always being ready to protect yourself. Often, it's a feeling of self doubt and hearing the voice that insists you're being misunderstood, even when others are trying to connect.
But defensiveness doesn't have to be your default. With self-awareness and practice, you can learn to pause before reacting, listen and be present without preparing your rebuttal and allow yourself to be vulnerable in moments that matter. There is a gentler way - towards conversations that feel safe, connections that deepen through honesty and a sense of security that doesn't require verification.
Impostor Syndrome
Impostor syndrome can haunt every aspect of your life. It convinces you that your success is a fluke, makes you fear being "found out" and turns achievements into evidence of how well you've fooled everyone. You might find yourself curating your responses to elicit the response you desire, afraid you will otherwise be seen as inadequate. Sometimes, it feels like you're performing a role - waiting for someone to realise you don't belong or you're not a good friend.
It can show up as downplaying your accomplishments, over-preparing for everything, or attributing praise to luck or timing. It can make your mind feel like a courtroom - a gnawing fear before presentations, the exhaustion of feeling like a fraud, the certainty that others are more qualified than you are. Often, it's the voice that insists your success is temporary and undeserved, or you don't deserve your relationships.
But impostor syndrome doesn't reflect reality. With time and self-compassion, you can learn to recognise your genuine contributions, accept that growth involves uncertainty and trust that you've earned your place. There is solid ground - towards owning your achievements, embracing your expertise and moving forward with confidence in your abilities.
Limerence - the obsessive side of love
Experiencing limerence can be exhausting. It holds you in its tight grip experiencing intense emotions and obsessive thoughts, idealising the person you feel “love” for. It can feel euphoric - your brain flooded with dopamine and adrenaline, creating an addictive cycle of craving attention and validation from the object of our affection. The intense focus can consume our thoughts, disrupt sleep and distort reality, especially if your feelings are unreciprocated or their responses ambiguous.
Limerence often presents through intrusive thinking, emotional dependence on the person's responses and a hypersensitivity to their perceived signals. Every interaction - whether in-person, online, or imagined, is analysed for clues of mutual interest. Unlike healthy love, limerence hinges more on fantasy than reality, feeding off uncertainty and hope. You experience feelings of euphoria when receiving validation, followed by deep despair when not.
Overcoming limerence can feel insurmountable and you question if you will ever be able to let them go. Healing from it requires effort, letting go of everything associated with them and focusing on your self development. With non judgemental and compassionate work on your unresolved attachment patterns and underlying emotional needs, it is possible to feel like yourself again. Once it is resolved, we regain clarity and self-agency, making space for genuine connection - built on mutual respect rather than emotional dependency.
People Pleasing
People-pleasing might seem kind or selfless on the surface, but over time, it drains our energy, erodes self-worth and creates resentment. Constantly prioritising others’ needs above our own leads to burnout and emotional disconnection from ourselves. It often stems from a deep fear of rejection or conflict, where approval from others feels necessary for safety or belonging.
People-pleasing can look like always saying “yes,” avoiding disagreement, over-apologising, or feeling anxious when others are upset. It may be hard to set boundaries or express personal needs. Even praise can feel uncomfortable and decisions might be based more on what others want than what feels right personally. Over time, this can create an internal identity crisis - who we are gets lost beneath who we think we’re supposed to be.
Overcoming people-pleasing starts with awareness and self-compassion and recognising the patterns without judgment. Learning to say “no,” to tolerate discomfort and communicate honestly are key steps. As we let go of the need to please everyone, we rebuild a sense of self. We become more grounded, authentic, and emotionally free, able to show up in relationships without abandoning ourselves.
Inner Critic
Our inner critic shapes how we feel about ourselves - negatively. It is harshly judgemental and critical, moralistic and uncompromising. It can cause us to believe we are lesser than others, destined for failure and lower our self esteem. Developing from infancy it can persist throughout life and increases when we struggle with difficult circumstances. We might think that by exercising our inner critic, we are motivating ourselves, however the opposite is true.
The inner critic can take many forms - perfectionism, procrastination, people pleasing and impostor syndrome. It often appears when we put ourselves out there or make mistakes - real or perceived - that cause feelings of shame and guilt. The inner critic is a symptom of anxiety, an unhelpful thinking habit and only erodes our self confidence.
You can master your inner critic and achieve greater peace - by recognising it actually means well in protecting us from failure and ostracism, albeit over zealously. With self reflection and self compassion, it is possible to soften our inner dialogue with more supportive messages to build confidence, resilience and freedom to achieve, without anxiety and fear.