Understanding Anxiety: Causes, Triggers, and Paths to Healing

What exactly is anxiety?

Anxiety disorder is not simply a passing worry or nervousness – it is a patterned way of thinking and reacting that can quickly become habitual. Each anxious thought may feel like it brings short-term comfort, but the relief is fleeting. Very soon, another thought arrives, demanding attention, and the cycle repeats. This loop can leave us feeling stuck, tired of our own minds and convinced that we are living with anxiety rather than truly living our lives.

Because we get so used to worrying, it becomes difficult to recognise when our mind is engaged in creative problem-solving versus when it is trapped in unproductive rumination. While approaches like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT for anxiety) are often recommended to manage symptoms, true healing may require going beyond analysing thoughts and uncovering the emotions underneath. For some, the first step can be as simple as seeking online therapy for anxiety, where guidance feels accessible and safe.

Anxiety as a learned behaviour

Our brain works like a highly responsive system, similar to a muscle in that it strengthens whatever is practised most often. When we consistently engage in anxiety thinking patterns, such as catastrophising, replaying the past, or fearing the future, we create habitual ways of coping. Over time, these patterns become automatic, meaning that when the nervous system is triggered, the mind falls back on worry because it feels familiar.

Why am I anxious all the time?

These repeated thought styles turn rumination into a go-to coping mechanism, even though it fuels greater unease. We confuse the emotions generated by imagined, fearful scenarios with the truth of what we actually feel. We lose touch with our true emotions, so we doubt ourselves, which creates further anxiety. This is why so many people describe feeling anxious “for no reason” and why generalised anxiety disorder (GAD), health anxiety, or social anxiety can quietly take root without us even noticing.

What causes and triggers anxiety?

Anxiety rarely appears out of nowhere. It often develops out of unresolved issues that shape our sense of self. These can include:

• Childhood experiences and insecure attachment patterns

• Low self-esteem, shame, or lack of self-compassion

• Constant self-criticism or perfectionism

• People-pleasing and fear of rejection

• Relationship difficulties and insecure bonds

• Grief, loss, or trauma

• Marginalisation, bullying, or exclusion

• Stressful life changes or uncertainty

When these struggles persist, they may develop into more specific conditions like panic attacks, phobias, or even health-related anxiety, each reinforcing the cycle of worry.

What if CBT or exposure therapy don’t work?

For many, CBT therapy for anxiety and exposure exercises provide lasting relief. They help challenge negative thoughts, reduce avoidance and build resilience. But for some people the anxious cycle returns. If you are highly self-critical, have avoidant or anxious attachment, or are skilled at suppressing emotions, CBT alone may not address the underlying causes. It may interrupt the habit, but unless the root issue is uncovered, old patterns re-emerge.

This doesn’t mean CBT “doesn’t work” – rather, it means additional approaches may be needed. For example, EMDR therapy for anxiety and trauma or Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT for anxiety) may reach deeper layers and bring lasting change.

What to do if anxiety keeps coming back

Anxiety is a symptom, a response to something deeper. When worry returns despite your best efforts, it’s important to ask: What am I avoiding or protecting myself from? Exploring those core fears, often with a therapist through anxiety counselling or even booking therapy sessions online, allows you to change how you relate to yourself and others.

Healing from anxiety: proven strategies

Anxiety is never “just anxiety”. It is the surface expression of something beneath. Healing involves both understanding those roots and learning healthier ways to use the mind and body.

Creative and mindful engagement

Rumination thrives on idle mental energy. Engaging the brain creatively – through art, music, writing, problem-solving, or even playing games – activates networks that compete with worry. When you are absorbed in something meaningful, rumination naturally lessens.

Grounding and mindfulness techniques

Popular approaches for managing anxiety include:

• Breathwork: slow breathing exercises, such as inhaling for 4 seconds and exhaling for 6.

• Grounding: the 5-4-3-2-1 sensory method (noticing five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, one you can taste).

• Mindfulness meditation: observing thoughts without judgement and returning focus to the present moment.

• Progressive muscle relaxation: tensing and releasing muscles to reduce physical tension.

These strategies are often integrated into therapy for panic attacks, social anxiety, or generalised anxiety, helping people manage symptoms in daily life.

Healthy lifestyle foundations

• Regular exercise to regulate stress hormones

• Consistent sleep routines

• Balanced diet, reducing stimulants like caffeine

• Limiting alcohol and nicotine, which worsen anxiety
  

Self-compassion and boundaries

Replacing harsh self-criticism with compassion reduces anxiety’s grip. Equally, setting boundaries – learning to say no, avoiding people-pleasing, and choosing healthy relationships – supports long-term wellbeing.

Therapy and professional support

Different therapies can help when CBT is not enough, such as:

• Compassion-focused therapy

• Psychodynamic or relational therapy

• EMDR therapy for anxiety and PTSD

• Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT for anxiety)

More and more people now book therapy sessions online for anxiety, valuing the privacy and convenience of accessing help from home.

Moving towards lasting freedom from anxiety

Long-term recovery requires more than stopping rumination. It means building self-awareness, acceptance and genuine connection. When we feel understood, safe, and connected, anxiety symptoms lose their intensity.

Practical steps include:

• Exploring your identity and values: understanding what matters to you.

• Building authentic relationships: seeking people and environments that foster trust and connection.

• Focusing on gratitude and achievements: shifting attention away from fear towards appreciation.

• Breaking tasks into small steps: reducing overwhelm by working incrementally.

• Practising presence: focusing fully on the task or moment in front of you, rather than on imagined futures.
  

Anxiety is not a permanent state, it is a learned habit of the mind, often developed as protection against deeper emotional pain. By understanding its triggers, using tools like mindfulness and creative engagement and seeking professional support where needed, it is possible to break the cycle.

Healing from anxiety means not only quieting the mind but also reconnecting with yourself and others in a more authentic way. With patience, practice and the right support, anxiety can shift from being a dominant force to something manageable and eventually, a reminder of your own resilience.

Book a free consultation today